WORDS

I went to see my Therapist friday and the question of the day was "Why do you have a hard time saying certain Words?" Words are a big trigger for me. I have been in trouble for certain words and others I was told during the abuse. I have to remind myself that I cannot hold that against myself because it wasnt my fault. All of my feelings live in my stomach. I have things all bottled up in there. When I speak I listen to my stomach to see how it feels. I have a very hard time speaking to others and totally expressing how I feel about something and that bothers me. I want to be able to express myself and not shut down then have to cut myself to have a feeling or come back to reality. I work alot just to keep my mind off of the major problems in my life because possible I would be gone mentally to the point of no return. MAYBE I'M JUST SCARED TO FACE THE THINGS I FEAR. IT'S EASIER TO WALK AWAY FROM EVERYTHING.